Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Indoor Rainbows Strictly Prohibited

Now my friggen' dog is in heat.  As if the first week of school wasn't already an adjustment, now I get to come home to horny animals.  And I'm sure you can imagine the interesting conversations this sparks between myself and my seven year old.  Elijah was playing outside earlier, when he suddenly peeked his head inside the door and said, "Mom, Cricket and Kalzhagi are humping."  After recovering from the initial shock of hearing my son's cute little chipmunk voice say the word "humping" (seriously, where did he pick that up from?), I told him, "Thanks for the update bud, but let's come up with a different way to say that."  We all brainstormed for a minute.  Trinity came up with "making rainbows," and I suggested "playing leapfrog."  We quickly ran out of ideas though, and frankly, I was more than ready to change the subject. 

But then, about ten minutes ago, Elijah let the dogs in the house.  In a matter-of-fact voice he told them, "You two can come in now, but no making rainbows in the house."

I'd write more, but I think I might be on the verge of peeing my pants from laughing so hard, so I better go recover.


  1. I just had a flashback to high school, when you refused to say the f-word, replacing it with "bunnies"... oh, the things I manage to stow away in the back of my brain for a rainy day, eh?! Now if only I could remember the information for my comps as well, we'd be set. :D

  2. Your memory is something else, Kristyn! I had completely forgotten about the whole "bunny" thing. Wish I could say that I'm STILL using cute little euphemisms in lieu of offensive language, but my nearly-full swear jar would testify otherwise.

  3. Lol making rainbows!! I love it. I bought my dog a sleeping pad once and it turned out to be more of a partner for him and I had to toss it to avoid the constant explaining to the kids he's just itchy and scratching himself on the pillow.


Thanks for your comment!